Monday, June 8, 2009

Getting my groove back

Slowly, but surely I've been getting back to normal. Having the husband's parents in town isn't exactly normal, but it does give me plenty to focus on that is not miscarriage or ttc-related so I have lots of distractions. Granted, not all good distractions, but generally I think I'm finding my way back to quite an enjoyable life. People who don't know what's gone on for me in the last few months probably think there hasn't been any particular change, even close friends and family might not think I needed to worry about 'getting back to normal', but really, as I've made progress in that direction, I realize over and over again that this is a long process and I still have quite a bit of work to do.

This weekend was great in that it was really relaxing and fun, but I also got a few things accomplished (books read, laundry done, friends visited) while not feeling like I was running from place to place. My husband and I spent some really good quality time together too. Last night I started reading "Miscarriage : why it happens and how best to reduce your risks" by Henry M. Lerner. Reading the book is interesting, but a little scary- I'm really, really hoping that my chemical pregnancy and then my miscarriage were just bad luck and that I am not going to be experiencing recurrent miscarriage. I'm quite certain I'm not that brave and strong.

I think some health progress has been made too. Last week I got blood drawn for the ninth or tenth time this year, this time to have my thyroid tested again. The results indicated that the medication I had been taking was not helping enough so the dosage has been increased. Right now I feel hopeful that this new dose of thyroid medication can help me along the path to having a healthy conception and pregnancy a little ways down the road.


  1. sending you warm thoughts as you continue your healing and ttc again.

    I recommend "Pregnancy After Loss". It discusses pregnancy after miscarriage and infant death.

  2. I'm glad you're starting to get back to some sort of routine and feel "normal". It's a HUGE step in healing yourself. One day you'll find that you're not trying to stay busy, but you're actually just living your life. That will be a nice moment for you.
    Good luck with your new medication dosage. I hope it's the key for you!

  3. Thanks :-) I do feel like I'm living my life and not just trying to stay busy. I'm also much less frequently blind-sided by grief.